Of Hugs, Confessions and Pain
by rein hitomi
Summary: For someone like his Kikumaru-sempai, a hug is enough.


**Pairing/s:** RyoSaku, one-sided EijiRyo

**Warnings:** Shounen-ai, and Eiji angst

**Disclaimer:** I don't own PoT. If I did, you wouldn't want what I would do to it.

**Author's notes:** excessively _long_ and _obvious_ hints of EijiRyo, and nonsensical babblings inside. Went through another painstaking scrutiny courtesy of me because I noticed that there were some..phrases that tend to mislead and confuse. Now, on with the story!

**Summary:** For someone like his Kikumaru-sempai, a hug is enough.

* * *

**Of Hugs, Confessions and Pain**

It was a nice, sunny morning. Apollo's rays covered the land, embraced everything in its path, and gave warmth to the creatures and mortals alike on and about their usual routine of activities.

Echizen Ryoma was not an exception.

As he was walking along the pavement of their school, Seishun Gakuen, the Prince of Tennis suddenly thought it was pointless to go to school if he already knew what was in store for him. Tons of assignment, a skit with him as a princess, practice with the team and probably 50 laps if Tezuka said (or rather wanted) so. It seemed as if everything was planned for him, and that nothing would ever change.

"O-CHI-BI!!!"

And this, the infamous bear hug waiting for him by the school gates, was not an exemption.

Ryoma's golden eyes widened by a fraction, having heard the dreaded nickname someone had always "liked using it on you, nya!" as quoted. He had tried getting ready for the upcoming move, but found it hard to do so, since this _was_ the acrobat we were talking about.

"Ohayou, Ochibi!" said Kikumaru Eiji, one-half of the Golden Pair of Seigaku, the dynamic acrobat, and the giver of all hugs that was to be received by Echizen. Ryoma tried to break free from the embrace that literally made him kiss the ground he was walking on (earlier, that is. Ah, poor Ryoma-kun.) but he knew it was futile. You could never break free from Eiji's hugs.

"Let go, Kikumaru-sempai." Ryoma barely uttered. (Well, he _was_ still lying on the ground. That's how Eiji's hugs went. Everyday.) And after the usual glare, came the next adage, "You're annoying." Although this seemed to do the trick, this only made Eiji loosen his strong hug on Ryoma. But it did not make the redhead completely let go of the golden-eyed boy.

"Aww, you're so mean, nya!" Ryoma sighed. Today would be the day, another day sweet Kami-sama, that he would yet again listen (or rather, glare) as his sempai chattered on. "You always tell me to 'shut up, Kikumaru-sempai.'" At this, Eiji did an imitation of Ryoma's look and voice. "Or 'Let go, sempai'! You're so mean to me, Ochibi, nya!" The redhead babbled on, and wasn't quite finished yet. "You also never greet me, Ochibi! You only glare and always tell me that I am annoying, nya!" When Echizen couldn't take a single bit of the rants, he mustered all the glares there were in the world and walked past Eiji. At this, the acrobat had momentarily shutted up, but shouted at the retreating back of Ryoma. "Hoi, hoi, Ochibi!" Yet Echizen did not look back. He just kept on walking until he reached the stairs, and was soon out of sight.

And true, Echizen never saw the pain that flitted in those cerulean eyes of his sempai, because he _was_ out of sight.

Kikumaru stood for another five minutes until the bell rang. It was only then that he broke out of his reverie – and the pain he felt when his Ochibi glared daggers at him.

* * *

"Eiji."

Cerulean eyes widened upon hearing his name, and widened once more when they registered who was calling him. He trudged silently, keeping his head lowered. For once, Eiji feared eye contact. He was afraid that, if he looked at anyone, they would see what lay behind his eyes. But this did not get past Seigaku's Tennis Club Captain.

"Eiji. Look at me." Tezuka said, his voice calm, firm, and yet conversational. The usual aptitude of his, but concern laced his words. Eiji bit his lip and considered disobedience for a moment; nevertheless, he complied. Tezuka sighed, adjusted his glasses and stared intensely at the redhead. At this, Kikumaru shifted and looked away, unable to stand the scrutinizing gaze of his captain. Again, Tezuka sighed.

"Talk to Echizen. I'm sure the problem will be solved."

"E-Eh?" Eiji did a double take. Sure he heard Tezuka wrongly? But the brown-haired senior had already announced a break, and the redhead could do nothing but follow. And maybe a certain little guy to spill the beans to.

* * *

To say that the energetic acrobat – who seemingly lost his energy after the incident that morning – was stunned would be an understatement. To assume that he was delirious would still be far too inadequate. For nothing could describe what the redhead had felt the moment he was about to call out and steer one boy away somewhere private. Nothing would ever alleviate the blast of pain that shot through his entire body, numbing his senses, clouding his mind, fogging his eyes, tearing his heart…

He was not prepared for what he witnessed.

"A-anou, R-Ryoma-kun…"

Ryoma turned around, expecting to see a certain brown-haired girl holding a bento. He sighed and faced her, his visage never changing: for one with what these professional tennis players would call "normal eyesight". But for some with trained eyes, and much more for someone like the redhead, it was plain to see that there was a sudden difference with the way Ryoma normally looked than this…this kind of look. Eiji's eyes widened when he saw the tiniest hint of a warm twinkle in those usually calm golden depths. There was also the miniscule upward lift of the corners of his lips: a clear indication of a smile. And not like the usual smiles or smirks he gave – this one had something more special to it. A smile that belonged only to one. A grin that was meant to be seen by the eyes of this girl with braided hair. A soft, warm smile that was only for Ryuzaku-san's granddaughter…

A smile that was never directed to Eiji.

That he saw and realized it now caused a queer ache in his heart. He knew that he should not think such, but the abruptness in which the tables turned caught the redhead off-guard, rendered him speechless, simply stunned to the core. The fact that Echizen never gazed at anyone like _that_ made him hurt, all the more than it should.

"Arigatou, Sakuno-chan." The golden-eyed boy said, the customary monotone voice in place. This did not make Sakuno waver. She was used to his monotonous replies.

"Iie. It was nothing. Anou, s-shall we go now…?"

Ryoma smiled – a real, sincere smile – and then, out of the blue, he grabbed Sakuno's wrist…

And he embraced her.

It was the most un-Ryoma like thing to do, and yet who's to say the Prince of Tennis wasn't full of surprises? However, it was factual that this may had been the very first of such a strong display of affection… Without any particular care about the passer-by's, without giving attention to anyone who probably came across this scene…

Without any notice of Kikumaru's tearing apart.

For Eiji, the last straw had been strung, the final act had come.

And so, blinded by tears and numb with grief, he ran.

* * *

Of all the places a broken soul could go to cry his heart out, Eiji was surprised that he came bursting into the locker room.

He did; after seeing _that_ scene he fled whilst tears stung his eyes. He even tripped, fell, stood up, ran, hit his shoulders on a post, stood up, ran on. The pain he felt on his right shoulder could not compare with what he felt in his chest - he thought it would explode. He slumped on one of the lockers and buried his face between his knees, hugging them for all the comfort it did. The tears came noisy; they were hot, they pulsed. He did not care. He did not care even if someone walked in suddenly. Eiji was far too immersed in his own little world, a world that was vibrant not so long ago, and now…

"Kikumaru-sempai."

It was astonishing that even if the call was stated quite sharply, the redhead did not hear it. Whether he pretended not to or did not really hear it, he remained still, his head further hidden between his knees and his bangs covering his face. The person addressing the azure-eyed junior sighed, and then decided that if he _ever_ wanted to talk to his sempai again, he'd have to get on his good side first. Right, well sitting beside him might be a nice move…

"Don't come near me." Eiji muttered, scooting away from the person. He knew who it was. He _did_ hear him, and knew instantly who the owner of that voice was. Yet he kept on being obtuse to the other's advances.

"Kikumaru-sempai, you're being annoying." Echizen said, could not take his sempai's mannerisms. However, Eiji quickly turned to look at him. What Ryoma saw made his eyes widen, and for once, fear resided in his mind.

Eiji was…his countenance…

Ryoma couldn't believe that the person whose face was pinched with anger was the selfsame acrobat who used to be bright and carefree.

The next spur of events nearly drove Ryoma to insanity. Eiji, whose reflexes suddenly went back to their usual speed, grabbed the front of his shirt and roughly pulled the younger boy towards him, bringing their faces to a mere inch apart. The redhead bared his teeth and snarled, left eye twitching with unspoken madness.

"You… You always say I'm annoying. You never looked twice in my way without saying that _I'm_ annoying! Who are you to say that, anyway? All this time! I'd been trying to make you notice me, tried to bring our friendship to at least a higher level, tried to make you _realize_ that I am more, so much more than the annoying sempai you've always known of!" The redhead shouted, shaking the smaller boy hard. The tears came again, hot as ever. Eiji shutted his eyes tight, gritting his teeth to control the temper unbeknownst to him existed. "I am so m-much more than a p-person who tries t-to h-hug you everyday, kn-knowing th-that i-it's the only thing I c-could do…" By this time, Kikumaru had his head rested on Ryoma's left shoulder, hoping to find comfort though his Ochibi would surely give none.

"I understand."

"H-Huh…?" The cerulean-eyed junior lifted his head to look at his Ochibi. He searched those golden orbs and though they were lit with hesitation, nothing betrayed the intention Eiji saw beneath those haunting eyes.

"I said, I understand. I'm not angry at you, Eiji-sempai." Ryoma tilted his head to get a better view of his sempai. When he saw that the redhead was in doubt, he pressed on. "I hate it when you hug me, or anyone else for that matter. But…" The Prince of Tennis closed his eyes and tried to formulate the right sentence. Eiji, by that time, had sat still in front of Ryoma, waiting for him to continue. "I hate it more when you change all of a sudden." Echizen slowly opened his eyes and, for the first time in Eiji's life…

Ryoma smiled genuinely at him. At him.

That he did now caused his heart to palpitate and constrict even more painfully than before.

"O-Ochibi…" Kikumaru stuttered, his breath caught in his throat.

"It's not the Kikumaru-sempai I've known."

And again, the tears came. But this time, they were silent, flowing freely on those smooth cheeks. It was the tears of acceptance, the tears that finally, finally understood what it meant to be friends… And just treasure such a wonderful thing. Eiji understood the underlying meaning behind those words, and now he comprehended just how foolish he became. Wild accusations of not apprehending him, jealous fits, blinded by the rage of emotions that welled up inside him… Eiji had become irrational, and that he realized it now made him feel admirably lighter. But now, the tears celebrated comprehension and the revival of him…the old him.

"Ochibi… Arigatou." The redhed said, the smile brought back on his face. Ryoma pulled his cap down and muttered his usual "Mada mada dane," but in truth, he just wanted to hide his face.

His old sempai was back, and so was everything else.

_That_ being said…

"O-CHI-BI!!"

And so were the hugs.

* * *

"Ryoma-kun… Eiji-sempai… I'm glad you two patched things up." A girl muttered beneath her breath, smiling broadly as she watched Eiji laughing once more, and Ryoma trying to pry her sempai off him.

Even so, she did not miss the secret smile on the golden-eyes boy's face.

* * *

Can you not hear the pleas of the 'Review the Story/Chapter' button? It is asking for salvation! Quick, click on it now and save the poor, poor thing!XD


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